'MERICA

OK Party people. 

Let's talk America. Independence. Love. Life. Liberty. And, of course, the pursuit of happiness - whatever that might mean to you. 

Get your flip flops, your daisy dukes, that vodka infused watermelon and celebrate your independence - individuality - and - youth. 

Make sure to equip yourself with the right tunes to tackle the weekend.

Pre-gaming.
Taking a break cause you pre-gamed too hard.

Go ahead and get your flirt on.

Making sure you are bringing it back to the real thing.

Fist pumping for the USA.

Don't forget how far we've come.

We love you America.

Holiday Gift Guide 2010

What are you giving who for what holiday?

The Prigsons hope we can help you with this seasonal problem with our official 2010 holiday gift guide.

"But it's too late for Christmas shopping! There's no way I can get this amazing gifts for the person specified on your list without subjecting myself to the horror of last minute shopping!"

We hear your concerns. That's why the Prigsons officially celebrate Christmas according to the Julian calendar. This means you have until --what the rest of the world considers-- 7 January.

We have chosen the five following categories to gift, if you are having trouble with gifting someone outside these categories, we recommend the ChiaObama:

1) significant other/

2) family

3) co-worker

4) neighbour/roommate

5) acquaintance/subway crush

Scott

1) For your significant other, I recommend something lasting. Something that used to dangle off a living animal's body that now inhabits your earlobe. Every time your loved one is gently scratched on the nape by these squirrel paw earrings, they will think of your undying love, and be grateful rabies can only be passed through saliva.

2) In these days of wishy-washy morals, let your family know that you believe in family values, real family values, with this limited edition 48x64 billboard of the model family. Printed using the finest ink in all of North Korea, Eternal President Kim Il Sung, son Kim Jong Il and head wench Lil' Kim Gib will show your family what you think of them: paranoid heartless dictators who believe they're gods.

3) Do you have that co-worker who always loses their phone? That (plus any chance of a date) won't happen when you give them a foam banana cell phone cover.

4) In this season of materialism and greed, it's easy to forget the true meaning of Christmas: making  one of your many secular Jewish neighbours uncomfortable with awkward Christ references. How better to make them ponder the true meaning of separation of church and state as they stay home eating toast while you go to your religious services on a public holiday.

5) Your roommate and you are always in competition whether you like to admit it or not. Whether it's "who can stay home the latest and still get to work on time" or "who can leave food out the longest before the other notices". Level the playing field by winning the "who can get the hottest date." They won't with a few spritzes of this Chocolate Chip Cookie Dough Perfume. This should make up for time your roommate spiked your coffee with ExLax before your brother's first communion.

Priscilla

1) For your very creative significant other, I think the best thing to get them is washable crayons. You never know when your romantic interest might get the urge to create something beautiful on a surface you'd like to keep clean.

2) Having a family is expensive. According to recent studies at a magazine I picked up at a truck stop in Jersey, the costs of raising a child to 18 is now almost $235. Show your family that you want to help out with budgeting with wearable blankets. That way, no matter how low the thermostat goes, everyone is happy.

3) You've seen your co-worker's Dr. Spock sock garters. You've seen him take five extra minutes at lunch every day to practice his Klingon with the janitor. Why not show him you care with this Captain Kirk music box. When opened, the box plays the classic Star Trek TV theme song. Remember, since the concept of December 25 is purely based on our orbit in the solar system with the rotation of the earth, so odds are, somewhere in the universe, there's something resembling December 25 at any time of the year.

4) Neighbours are a tricky thing. You don't want them to be great friends, but you should have a relatively amiable relationship to keep them from dropping bowling balls on your ceiling at 1:30 a.m. Why not give them the gift of another limb. Because you can never have too much of a good thing.

5) A White family tradition is to gift strangers with something useful in the month of December. If you're up to this, I recommend a spork. With the features of both a spoon and a fork, it's just about the most useful thing you can get a casual acquaintance.

"Everyone needs a spork" -my mom

Rachel

1) Nothing says LOVE like choice, and that's what you get: 3 deliciously fresh flavored popcorn. Plus, you can re-use the tin as a bathroom trashcan.

2) Your grandma probably hates that you've gone vegan. Help an old lady out by giving the gift of being able to mold tofu into a beautiful turkey bird. No one will know the difference, except those of us with tongues. 

3) Here is just the thing to help that co-worker that can never quite get his or her desk organized. 

4) Everyone loves them and what better way to strike up a conversation with that cutie on your morning commute than to offer them one : a muffin. Better yet, how about a muffin making machine. They probably already have one (an oven) so complete the equation with a tin.

*may lead to a lack of class and self-respect

5) We all stumble into the wrong apartment/room sometimes. Keep things civil by offering a convenient way to label.  This antique model (1989) offers a 3D effect, perfect for those frequent NYC blackouts. 

Prigson Savings Time Weekend

To celebrate daylight savings time ending on Sunday, the Prigsons, spent their weekends apart in an effort to improve the overall Prigson experience. We each learned a little something about ourselves and the passing of the stars.

Priscilla

 

Priscilla, being the social media chair, spent the weekend at the 3rd annual Social Media Association Conference Consultation International Time, or SMACC-IT. SMACC-IT is held every year in the beautiful seaside resort of Hoboken, New Jersey. The Prigsons spared no expense to send our social media chair to the conference, hosted by Prince. Priscilla stayed in the highly renowned Hoboken Inn, which promises a free tetanus shot with every stay.

Priscilla reports that she learned several new social media measures to boost the already successful social media-ness of the Prigsons. She confirmed reports of a new social media network that allows complete submission to following your friend's lives. Social Time Aimed at Linking Kindness or STAALK aims to be the ultimate in social networking by December 2012. Priscilla signed the Prigsons up to be one of the first groups on the groundbreaking networking site. According to STAALK procedures, we should be getting our ankle bracelets installed as early as next June.

Rachel

Rachel, being the most caring and tender of the Prigsons, chose to give up her weekend to stay at home with the Gremlin. Gremmy wasn't feeling so well after accidently eating some tainted trail mix. Rachel knows a plethora of lullaby songs to calm any young one. Gremmy's favourite is a local Chilean song which translates to "Even if your black market value tripled, I'd still be hesitant to sell you."

Rachel is happy to report that the Gremlin is feeling much better. His fever broke early Sunday morning and was back to being his normal self by Sunday night. The Prigsons thank Rachel for her dedication and kindness.

Scott

Scott's weekend plans were cut short when he was kidnapped by the Staten Island Liberation Army. SILA has been seeking to become independent of New York City through violent means since the early 1970s. Scott was touring the famed Staten Island landfill when members of SILA pistol whipped him and shackled him to a stryker frame. After being held captive for 10 hours in a bunker under the Staten Island Zoo, Scott suffered severe Stockholm syndrome and took on the name "Staaten Eylandt". As Mr. Eylandt, Scott performed a variety of scams aimed at raising money for the organization. One of the most devious and heinous tasks was joining the Staten Island tourist association and convincing tourists in lower Manhattan to visit Staten Island for its "number of exciting tourist attractions."

Through a mistake in the changing of the guards, Scott was able to escape and took the ferry back to Manhattan. Overall, Scott says this wasn't his worst weekend in New York, at least he didn't have to apartment hunt.

Welcome Booth Baby!

Soon after Ruben's arrival from Williamsburg

This past Wednesday, October 27th, we welcomed Giovani Lee Prigson into our lives! He weighed in at 8 lbs 5 ounces and is 77 inches long.

Dr. Matt Wingo assisted in labor and delivery. As we carried him outside for the ride home, strangers cooed at his cuteness and beauty.

We are proud, excited and ready for the new challenges of booth-hood.  We will call him Ruben for short.

Ruben's first meal consisted of a stir-fry from Trader Joe's and some brown rice.

He's already on to solid foods

Rachel L. Graves

 

Rachel casting her vote in the Chilean national election.

Hailing from the land of Chile, known for its rice and fresh cilantro, Rachel (meaning: fragrance) always stood out from her surroundings - - in more ways than one. Her exact birthplace / birth date are debated, but does it really matter people? She’s beautiful and you know you love her.

To really understand Rachel and all her glory, we’re going to have to trek back to the beginning….

Rachel’s father, Jean Claude Van Graves – originally from the U.S. of A. – was an important Comanche chief and the last leader of the powerful Quahadi band before they surrendered a battle at the Great Plains. This unforeseen loss caused Jean Claude to uproot his family, consisting of five wives and 25 children, and move to a small Chilean village in the Andes Mountans, where they resided for a number of years. While there, he and his family taught the natives all they needed to know about America: pizza, soccer and Pogs.

Rachel has two older blood-related siblings, both of whom are models and/or actors. Her brother Pecos (pecan) and sister, Topsana (prairie flower) played a large role in Rachel’s development and soon all Rachel talked about was “making it big” in America. The siblings formed a comedic trio and quickly outgrew their weekly gypsy gatherings. Within a week, Rachel convinced her family to leave to the village and swim back to America.

Being the most passionate and vocal member of the family, Rachel led the excursion carrying only a box of matches, a Hello Kitty notebook and pickles. “Life’s essentials,” as she called them. 

Unfortunately, Rachel took a wrong turn and ended up in Mississippi instead of California. Realizing the entire state had absolutely nothing to offer, Rachel immediately left her family and moved to Nashville. She began her career as a child fashion model before making her motion picture debut in Disney's 1998 remake of "The Parent Trap" at the age of 11. Unfortunately, her fame grew faster than her maturity level and her career was abruptly derailed a few years later with two DUIs and three visits to drug rehabilitation facilities.

In an effort to regain her artist spirit, Rachel travelled the world as merchant and rickshaw driver from 2007 to 2009. She often found herself in Bolivia and Thailand selling coin purses made of plastic bags, touting her trade as a campaign against the “unnecessary use of plastic bags.” 

Resuming her career in 2010, she guest starred in hit the TV series "Flavor of Love" and as an extra in the critically acclaimed drama, "August Rush." Feeling that she needed a little more out of life, she moved to New York City where she currently sits in parks as a form of art.

Scott Russell Dixon

Born in Kansas City in 1970, he prefers to go by Scot, finding the extra T excessive and an overall bore. Dixon's early education consisted of about 18 months of classes from several itinerant teachers; he was mostly self-educated and was an avid reader. Very tall and strong, adolescent Scot was handy with an axe and became a talented local wrestler, which imbued him with self-confidence. Scot pursued his love for candy necklaces, whoopee cushions and teddy bears by taking a part-time job at the local Dollar Tree as a greeter. He loved the long hours in his leisure suit. On the weekends young Dixon spent his days roaming the wilderness, hunting his own game, and chasing after his anarchist dreams. 

Since graduating with a degree in taxidermy from Waco University, Scot has traveled the world in search of the perfect prawn cracker. His journey landed him in "the Sas", Japan where he would spend a large portion of his early adulthood molding the minds of young children. He also did a few side gigs as a model for Gateway computers. 

 As a result of several bad experiences during his travels, Dixon had not flown on an airplane since the mid-late 1990s, traveling instead via a personal bus. In April 2009, Scot flew to London for the first time as a result of taking a ten hour course with Virgin Atlantic Airlines. He now builds model airplanes out of old coke containers (cans, bottles, caps, etc). He sells them on ebay. 

He currently works as an ad-hoc reporter for a Japanese news station in New York City and one day plans to own a plantain farm. He thinks the rent is too damn high.

Priscilla A. White

Priscilla in traditional South Carolinian costume

Priscilla comes from the noble lineage of the White family of the River Thames' East Bank. The Whites first crossed the Atlantic in 1567, but were immediately disgusted by the lack of proper hot cross bunneries. They returned in 1676 as a practical joke on their uptight parish. Unfortunately, no one quite understood their humour and they stayed in the colonies for good.

Priscilla, which comes from the proto Indo-European roots "Prees Ella", means "one who leaves one purse everywhere". Besides leaving her purse in a plethora of environments, Priscilla enjoys a wide range of leisure activities. Interested in midwifery from the first time she strolled into the birthing unit of the local hospital, Priscilla scaled Mount Everest at the age of 15 to assist a Sherpa in giving birth on the sacred peak. Other hobbies include: fairy garden rat parties, taking showers loud enough to warrant a noise complaint, falling asleep and just being fabulous.

Priscilla's education remains an important part of her everyday life. She lives by the philosophy "If you ain't learned it, you doesn't know it." Priscilla speaks fluent Greek, Hebrew and Baylor. Along with foreign languages, another passion of hers in the classroom is yellow chalk dust.

Priscilla moved to New York several years ago to pursue a career in being awesome. The job is very demanding and requires at least ten hours per day of being awesome. She enjoys her job but would really like the freedom to wear pleats or pastel flannel when she wishes.

Priscilla is the official social media and PR chair of the Prigsons. We are still trying to figure out what either of those things mean.

She's not a witch. She's nothing you've heard. She's you.